12 Comments
User's avatar
Toni Brayer's avatar

From one doc to another (IM here) I’m writing with tears and gratitude for your story and sharing of your journey. Just remarkable and moving.

Expand full comment
Ofifoto's avatar

"I’ve kept him alive by making life seem more appealing than the alternative."

Words to live, and love, by.

Expand full comment
Carol's avatar

A lovely story of wife/doctor, but also of life/death. It’s very meaningful. Thank you.

Expand full comment
Melissa Yi's avatar

What strikes me in your words, as well as in your photos, is your utter devotion to Jake. No one will ever doubt how much you love him.

Expand full comment
Eim HaBonim Smeicha's avatar

What a beautiful and eloquent tribute to your strong and connected relationship to Jake. This was so powerful to read. 💜

Expand full comment
Ryan McCormick, M.D.'s avatar

beautiful, again, thank you for sharing.

Expand full comment
Anita Giezentanner's avatar

Are you seeing your husband in Athena? I have an adopted daughter and I knew her birth mother briefly. There is a pitch to my daughter's laugh that I recognize and several subtle motions or actions I can easily identify as being somehow genetically encoded from her biological mother. Your husband lives on in your heart, your writings and your daughter.

Expand full comment
Bess Stillman's avatar

Very much! She's his little clone. Especially her facial expressions. I've seen them before on Jake's face. It knocks me over sometimes.

Expand full comment
Victoria's avatar

When I read your words, I imagine myself sitting alongside you listening, holding back comments because I know there is a longer, bigger message in your beautiful writing. There's so much I want to say, but it all feels inadequate in light of your grief and everything you've written. So I'll simply say, 'Thank you for sharing, Bess', and I'm sending you and Athena warm wishes and hugs.

Expand full comment
Barbara Schutt's avatar

Thank you for sharing this! I've gone through cancer and chemo back in 2017. That whole year was an eye opener for my husband and I both as we grappled with the possibility of my leaving this existence. Truly, it is heart wrenching to see a loved one "disappear" and for myself to feel I am "disappearing".

Expand full comment
Art Kupferman's avatar

Beautiful.

Expand full comment
Ragged Clown's avatar

I hope you have many happy memories, Bess, to go along with these difficult ones.

Expand full comment